As we approach the Holiday Season and a New Year, Surfillustrated.com will be providing some of the most beautiful bikini and swimsuit models of California, many of whom live right here in the Los Angeles , Orange County- theOC, and the numerous local beach communities of Southern California!

So pour yourself an extra eggnog this Holiday Season, don't be shy, add a little little Skyy Vodka, Kettle One, Beefeaters, or Jose Cuervo just for fun, depending on what your stomach can take. If the relatives and in-laws get on your nerves, bust out a six pack of Budweiser, Miller Genuine Draft, Coors, Heineken or Amstel light, and put on the headphones, crank up the X-box or Sony Playstation 3, and fire up Gears Of War, Resistance Fall of Man, Zelda, Twilight Princes of Time, or Call of Duty 3 so that your relatives and in-laws melt away into the background of holiday cheer like an ice cube in the heat of the Arizona desert in the middle of July.

If that doesn't work, go to your computer and download some Apple iTunes, crank up the iPod with Hell Bells by ACDC or Crazy Train by Ozzie to bring in the Holiday Spirit and New Year. If grandma asks you "what are you listening to," just pass the head phones over, and hit the shuffle button so that she can get a nice little sample love song from our modern day contemporaries- perhaps a sample of My Curse by Killswitch Engage. That will be sure to get you major points with grandma this holiday season!

And of course there is always the joy of having to find that perfect gift for everyone on your special holiday list. Personally, I would rather sit through 17 hellish days of traffic school sponsored by our lovely California DMV. Hell, for that matter, I'd rather sit through orientation classes on how to use paper knives and forks in California's toughest maximum security correctional facility.

If you are anything like me, you've enjoyed staying indoors over the last 4 days during the Thanksgiving Holiday weekend. Personally, I prefer to stay as far away from all the psychos and nut balls on the freeways and in the shopping malls.

And if you're think about grabbing a quick bite to eat while shopping- you better think again. I'd rather slide down a bannister of thorns, than have to listen to every little kid under the age of 5 whine and complain while peeing their pants waiting in line for a Happy Meal at Mc Donalds. If you live in Southern California the whole notion of getting fast food is a hilarious idea - it's neither fast nor food. One things for sure, we do not have a shortage of fast food establishments here in the Southern California area. We've got more Mc Donalds, Burger Kings, and Taco Bells, surrounding our cities than garlic strands around the necks of Big Time Wrestling fans watching a match between the Pope and Dracula.

Well, if you own a computer and know how to hit the start button and find that symbol that looks like the letter "e" (Internet Explorer for those of you less internet inclined) then your troubles are over- well half way over. Because all you need is the brain of a caveman, and wallet full of Visa, Master Card, or American Express cards, and you're well on your way to getting that holiday shopping list nailed in about 5.5 seconds - the same time is takes any 7 series BMW to go from 0 to 60 mph.

Whether you are a fan of Amzon.com, Ebay, Sony.com, X-box.com, Nintendo.com, IGN.com, Barnes and Noble Bookstores, Border Books, Gamefly.com, The Gap, Target, or Virgin.com, all your "man shopping needs" can be handled by these online companies, as they prepare to triple the number of employees in preparation for the online madness that is about to take place over the next 20 days.

Each company has factored into the formula man's human nature of procrastinating, as well as, an the incredible fear of crowds and shopping malls. So sit back and relax. Just go online and get it over with so you can get back to the things that really matter like watching your favorite college or pro teams destroy each other, Grey's Anatomy, CSI, Deal or No Deal, The Simpsons, South Park, Adult Swim, Comedy Central, King of the Hill or Family Guy, while enjoying a nice cold beer - now that's the kind of work I enjoy.

And just in case you haven't finished your online holiday shopping, and you need something for that certain individual who appreciates the finer things in life, like- exotic luxury sedans, mahogany desks, fine wines, and of course, let us not forget, Calendars and DVD's of beautiful swimsuit models and scantically clad women in bikinis.

This Holiday Surfillustrated.com wants all it's visitors to know about our special "Limited Time Holiday Offer." It's the "Buy One Get One Free Sale!" That's right, if you order one calendar for $9.95 or DVD for $15.95 we'll throw in an extra one to match the first item you ordered! The same is true of the Calendar and DVD Combo Set! Order 1 Calendar/DVD combo package and receive another Calendar/DVD combo package absolutely FREE! But you better hurry, this is a limited time offer! So order NOW, that way you can send a Calendar or DVD to Grandpa and keep one for yourself! Come on, you know he'd dig it!